Becoming

A nappy change, this time without any screaming. Quiet, calm, and compliant. Her gaze fixed on the soft book of farmyard images I had placed there in a previous attempt at distraction from the usually woeful experience of being removed from the security of giraffe pyjamas. I turned the pages, a colourful duck, a tractor, and the most fascinating drawing of a big red barn you had ever seen.

We moved down to the kitchen, and as she lay in the crook of my arm she watched as I skillfully washed her bottle one handed. In the lounge she listened as I read a magazine article aloud. She felt me blow some fluff off of her face.

She stared at me as I smiled. I made some funny faces and starting making an “ooo”ing sound, which caused one of the most incredible expressions. Her chin pulled backwards as her head slightly cocked to the side. Her, as yet non-existent, eyebrows raised. A combination of surprise and confusion, but ultimately, the look that she gave me was of interest.

This is one of those moments I have spoken about; right now I’m standing on the beach (if that doesn’t make any sense, see a previous post). Our baby is changing and this was a moment that revealed that to me. Whilst I knew, or had been told, that being a parent was rewarding, I didn’t truly know what those rewards would be, but it is an amazing feeling to see this tiny human develop before your very eyes, and it puts a lot into perspective. More than anything, it is an overwhelming, humbling, privilege to get a front row seat in seeing a person in this world slowly become who they are going to be.

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One thought on “Becoming

  1. Pingback: The Answer to Your Questions | How to be a New Dad

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